You think that it would be easy for people to be real or genuine but authenticity doesn’t come that easy. Why not? Because people are constantly maneuvering inside their heads trying to achieve or please. Sometimes while overthinking, they say things they don’t mean or hold back altogether. In the end, can we really spot real from fake? Well, here are 10 ways to spot the difference.
The first sign of inauthenticity is “showing off”. Inauthentic people like to show off and are full of themselves. They have a high opinion of themselves and they like to make sure that everyone around them sees how great are they. They are often the peacock of the group, always strutting and bragging about themselves, thinking they’re above everyone. Sometimes they’re so lost in their own bogus facade that they start believing in their own lies.
However, under their curated cover, they may be facing difficulty with low self-esteem. Under their facade, they might be using their bloated ego to hide their weakness. True humility comes from accepting flaws and being willing to work on your weaknesses rather than hiding them.
In order to spot a people pleaser, all you need to detect is love bombing. To detect a fake buddy you should be able to recognize the signs of a people pleaser. A person delivering over-the-top praises to ingratiate themselves to you. They ask a lot of questions but rarely give an answer of their own. That’s because they are reluctant to give a decisive answer which might conflict with your own.
Genuineness permits humanity and forgiveness. When you’re genuine, you mourn your failures and carry on. Grudges are not an alternative and will influence the happiness in your life. Duperon explains,
“Business is always at stake, and numerous risks fail. The game is to mourn your failures, pardon yourself, and come to the next resolution. Entrepreneurs who get stuck in unfortunate errors eventually reprise the same errors until the lesson is learned.”
Sometimes, authentic people have the worst days and they don’t always act like a pinnacle of integrity. Fake people on the other hand have a smile plastered on and never admit when they’re upset. They just behave passive-aggressively, damaging you and cutting you down while pretending they’re doing well. Naturally, the truth is that everyone gets sad and loses their temper once in a while.
Inauthentic people can be deprecating towards others, often as a way of acquiring authority. An inauthentic person will continually attempt to achieve the upper hand or win the confirmation of others by influencing those around them. But at the same time, they are unlikely to discourse any concerns head-on. Instead, they scrutinize others in order to make themselves emerge as more significant.
Sometimes when times aren’t right, we all need friends to lean on. But a fake person is never around when you need them. When they wanted you and you were there for them, it was all smiles and sunshine. But when you need them they’re nowhere to be seen. They hang around you whenever they want something from you but the moment you need something from them, they bail.
Too much of this world moves with a herd mentality. Genuine leaders are courageous and have hard conversations. They sometimes go against the grain in hopes that something amazing and truthful will evolve, even though they have to battle those who won’t agree and do the same.
Since the fake buddy has entered the circle, they feel entitled to brag about themselves. They seek to be in the center of the stage in conversation and are eager to get your attention. They’ll tell you all about their talents, especially the ones they’re good at.
Inauthentic people make themselves look good in front of everyone. Holding grudges against others is one of their main liabilities, as forgiveness would mean having the humility to see that no one is perfect. In their mind, they are perfect.
Under the hostile facade, an inauthentic person is storing up resentment and anger toward those around them. A cynical lens is what they see through the world because they have trust issues. Mockery and sarcasm are their way of bolstering their self-esteem which they have mastered through years of practice.
Separating the genuine from the fake is a difficult task.
When you’re sure that you’re dealing with an inauthentic person, you may feel sympathy towards them and feel that you should help them out of their behavior.
But the truth is that inauthentic people thrive on people who haven’t set their boundaries.
Authentic people attract authentic people. When you’re true to yourself and your boundaries, you attract other people who stay true to themselves.
Do you have fake people around you? Let us know in the comments. Find more similar blogs on Divine You wellness.