How to Communicate Better in a Relationship and Increase Intimacy

  • October 17, 2022
  • 5 min Reads
How to Communicate Better in a Relationship and Increase Intimacy

We enjoy interacting with others because it makes us happy; effective communication is essential for fruitful social engagement. For a relationship to be healthy and calm, communication is necessary. Furthermore, there is no need for small conversation.

While it’s OK to inquire about your partner’s day, you need to go deeper if you want an outstanding connection. The primary aspect of effective communication in a relationship is meeting your partner’s needs.

You must learn how to listen rather than talk if you want to increase communication in your relationship.

Signs that you need to improve communication

No matter how long you’ve been together, poor communication may turn even minor misunderstandings into mountains. Couples unable to communicate well may argue, withdraw from the situation, or emotionally distance themselves from one another.

What tells you that your partnership is having communication issues? Observe the following indicators:

  • You’re having problems communicating with your spouse; you repeatedly discuss the same subject without reaching a resolution.
  • You make it seem impossible to carry on a meaningful discourse without getting into a fight.
  • You’re hesitant to discuss certain subjects.
  • You no longer engage in meaningful conversation.

Why is communication in relationships important?

Since you most likely spend more time with your partner, there is a higher chance of misunderstandings and arguments.

But you’ll be rewarded when you master communication in relationships. Here are a few explanations of why communication is so important in relationships:

  • Increased Trust: In a relationship, accurate communication entails being able to talk to your spouse about anything, including your joys and sorrows, good days, and bad. Because you are confident in their unwavering love and support, you are willing to be vulnerable with them.
  • Increased Intimacy: Your ability to listen, comprehend, and sympathize with your spouse is greatly enhanced by learning how to improve communication in relationships.
  • Better Conflict Resolution: We all know partners who appear to quarrel constantly and those who never argue. Even if every relationship has its ups and downs, frequent fighting, and the absence of any conflict at all are indicators of poor communication in relationships.

How to improve communication in your relationships

  1. Ask open-ended questions
  2. Listen actively
  3. Commit to a genuine connection
  4. Pay attention to your non-verbal behavior
  5. Be honest
  6. Give respect
  7. Spend quality time

Your relationship will either succeed or fail based on communication.

By putting some of the following efficient communication techniques into practice, you can immediately improve your relationship

1. Ask open-ended questions

There are techniques to get your soul mate to reveal their deepest secrets without forcing them. For example, when you ask, “Did you have a pleasant day?” The expected answer is  “Yes or no.”

Instead, try asking more exploratory queries, such as “How was your day?” Yes, they might give a short non-answer (e.g., “good,” “fine,” or “the same”), but by asking open-ended questions, you provide them with the option to elaborate if they so desire.

Remember that not everyone is a straightforward person to open up to. If your partner doesn’t always share, have patience with them.

Common Traits of Unhappy Couples

2. Listen actively

Listening is one of the essential components of communication. Most of the time, communication between partners involves each party attempting to make their point.

To communicate effectively, you must develop your listening skills. Additionally, active listening entails much more than just remaining silent.

You must show your spouse that you genuinely care about them to listen effectively. Try to understand your partner’s perspective rather than trying to predict every scenario.

3. Commit to a genuine connection

Particularly in long-term relationships, it is simple to allow genuine connection and desire to wane. But admitting that you’re not connecting as much as you used to is the first step in learning how to enhance communication in a relationship.

Discuss how to revive your relationship with your partner and offer a starting point. Don’t worry if your partner isn’t on board. Relationships are places you go to show rather than take.

Many of these tactics can still be used even if your partner doesn’t make a commitment; you might even motivate them to do so.

4. Pay attention to your non-verbal behavior

It takes more than just what you say to communicate. You can communicate easily without using words by using your tone of voice, eye contact, gestures, posture, facial expression, nodding, clenched teeth, balled-up fists, and rolling your eyes. If you ignore your body language, your spouse may interpret your signals as expressing anger, discomfort, contempt, or disrespect without your knowledge.

5. Be honest

Being honest is the best way to enhance communication in a relationship. Make your demands and sentiments obvious by saying what you mean. Refusing to engage in a dispute may seem surprisingly safe and comfortable, but it doesn’t replace trust in a partnership and won’t improve your communication skills. Walking away from a disagreement is only necessary to achieve a brief cooling-off period and is a temporary solution to a continuing communication problem. 

6. Give respect

Maintaining and expressing concern for your partner at all times is crucial. Be mindful of what you’re saying and how you say it, even while disputing. A frustrated or furious partner is much less likely to carry on a productive conversation. Remember that once you say something, it cannot be changed.

7. Spend quality time

Communication and connection go hand in hand. You and your lover become closer when you are having fun together. You are more likely to disclose your deepest thoughts and feelings to someone you are close to. Choose a shared interest, schedule date nights, and spend a Sunday afternoon cuddling. You’ll talk more and have more fun if you’re having fun.


Never lose sight of the reasons why you decided to be together. While it can be easy to give up when problems arise, the truth is that these times will shape your partnership. Find out what needs your partner values most by listening to them, then provide those needs. When you realize that sharing is the key to a happy relationship, you’ll constantly endeavor to find understandable ways to connect with your partner.

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