Narcissism is a personality trait and a disorder that affects a major population, yet a narcissist may fail to recognize it. They display extreme self-involvement while disregarding others’ feelings. The trait stems from extreme self-love or ego.
The narcissistic person often is charismatic and charming and doesn’t display negative behavior easily, especially in relationships, In fact, they prefer to associate with people who can feed their ego, even if a relationship is shallow or temporary.
We tend to ignore others’ feelings sometimes, and that’s normal. However, people who suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are complicated to live with. You can easily identify a narcissist by these traits:
Relationships with narcissists will start like a fairy tale. They will bombard your phone with constant text messages and calls to declare their love for you in the first month of your dating.
They may emphasize your strong compatibility with them, or appreciate your intelligence, even if it has only been a few days into your relationship.
However, they can easily turn on you if they feel you have disappointed them. They will leave you alone to wonder what behavior ticked them off. However, it’s their own beliefs and nothing you did.
We all desire to be treated like kings and queens. However, if someone comes on too strong in the beginning, steer clear of them before you become a victim of their hot and cold behavior. Remember, love needs time to nurture and grow; it takes time to understand your partner and blend with their emotions.
If you feel your partner doesn’t know you well, or it’s too early in the relationship for them to profess their love, you are probably right! A narcissist manufactures shallow relationships.
A narcissist knows how to woo their date. However, you may experience a drastic shift in their behavior toward you. They may suddenly no longer appreciate your traits they once praised vehemently.
On the contrary, you may experience their indifferent behavior towards you, with a lack of empathy Or, you may only receive compliments from your narcissistic partner when in a social gathering, which makes them seem charming and loving in front of people, contradicting private behavior.
Often, a narcissist will engage in activities that would make them appear good in the eyes of people, displaying themselves socially, romantically, financially, physically, religiously, sexually, professionally, culturally, or academically.
They use objects, people, status, or accomplishments to substitute for their real, inadequate selves. The hidden message for this display is – “I’m worthy of people’s love, appreciation, and acceptance.”
A narcissist may gloat about an ex-partner to you or flirt with someone in front of you, and you instantly begin to feel jealous. Their need to control you and uplift their self-esteem pushes them to make this strategic move. So, understand their psyche and don’t let jealousy pangs strike you.
A narcissist will be high on manipulation. They can easily twist a situation to meet their agenda of self or ego satisfaction. They are masters at winning what they set their eyes on, lack empathy, and don’t hesitate to use manipulation to gain attention and validate their status. You will realize you were fooled only years later.
Gaslighting is a term that has its origin in the 1930s where a husband attempted to drive his wife mad by turning down the gas-powered lights in the home. When the wife questioned, he denied the act by saying they are on dimmers. Eventually, she would turn mad.
Gaslighting thus is a form of emotional abuse that focuses on denying an individual’s experience by making speeches, such as, “you are too sensitive.” It’s a strategy used by narcissistic partners when you confront them with your concerns and they turn on you with an incident or statement that you did in the past.
They try to create a diversion by stating that you are conspiring against them. Further, they deny any events that occurred causing you to get jittery. often used to avoid taking responsibility for one’s own actions.
A person who tends to exaggerate talents, accomplishments, experiences, and connections indicates the trait of grandiosity.
Such people maintain extravagant fantasy worlds with unreal experiences. Grandiosity is manifested through self-importance – they believe that their existence is more important and bigger than yours. Subsequently, they may amass great wealth, hold leadership positions, or be famous.
Grandiosity is seductive as a narcissist constantly boasts about their possessions, accomplishments, and experiences. They try to portray a larger-than-life image, always making you look small in their eyes.
A relationship is a partnership; it’s an equal exchange of love and compassion between partners. It involves accepting each other’s faults gracefully and working peacefully to resolve them. Narcissist struggles to accept their fault, and blame others with complex excuses and rationality.
If partners always show irresponsible behavior by never accepting their fault, it’s impossible to maintain a relationship with them. An important trait for a happy relationship. is to take ownership of both good and bad behavior and fixing it.
With these identifiable traits, you can evaluate if your partner is a narcissist, and end the relationship. If you continue to wait around for them to change, you will only meet disappointment and low self-esteem. Staying in an unhealthy relationship is not worth the damage it will do to your self-respect.
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