“The world says fit in; the universe says stand out.”
What exactly does it mean to fit in? Is it just the acceptance by society, friends, family, and other people? Is it just doing what others think you should? Or is there more to it? Is it good to fit in at all? Or should you try to stand out? What do you gain, and what do you lose? Let’s explore some ways to set yourself apart from the rest in order to have the life you want.
If you rock the boat, it might upset people and create problems. This is always the first thought that comes to everyone’s mind. And after this thought, there you are, a person trying to fit in; trying to mold yourself to be the way you think other people want you to be. And this is where the whole story of you not being yourself starts; you’re always hiding behind a mask. When you do this, your interactions with others are not genuine because people aren’t dealing with the real you. Give yourself full support to be who you are and there won’t be a need tottery to fit in.
Speak Up! It’s easier said than done. There’s always an awkward feeling speaking your mind at first. But, don’t let that awkward feeling discourage you. Always remember that the feeling of discomfort is the right step forward. A relationship built on silence and assumptions can have bad consequences. Take baby steps by asking a question, giving compliments, exchanging wishes on some occasions, or simply introducing yourself. You might not always get what you want, but if you overcome that fear brewing inside, you might get what you need by simply speaking your mind.
“Building dreams, each time, watching them break and then picking the broken pieces, building again with new hope and more courage. And maybe this effort is Life.”
Fitting in is always good when you are allowed to fulfill your desires. Actualize your potential, desires, and talents by being involved and staying committed to your interests and pursuits. When you follow the dreams of your heart, you will naturally fit in.
Things the Overachievers Do Differently (But Never Talk About)
Speak up! Overcome that awkward feeling to stand out. When you speak something that doesn’t please others but is right, you stand out. You may try to get that acceptance on social media, with your friends and groups, and among the masses. But that constrains you and builds a fear inside you. That fear grows and you don’t even realize that you are trying to fit into society. By simply being natural and true to yourself, you can help yourself to remove that fear, and stand out.
To live fully, try to spend more time on yourself, instead of trying to fit in everywhere. Who do you want to be? What do you love the most? If it was your last day on earth today, what would you do? You will end up having the answer to your question. Follow that passion, work crazily on it and keep that little fire burning, however small, however, hidden.
This one piece of advice announced in in-flight passenger announcements works just as well back on the ground: “Put your oxygen mask on first before helping others”. Don’t be a crowd-pleaser. Remember, you come first.
You have finally taken the plunge into the depth of your own personality. You have successfully tried to embrace your inner differences and brought about seemingly successful changes. But, this doesn’t mean that you’re immune to those differences that got you to suppress yourself in the first place. You have successfully taken the first step in the right direction. Be steadfast in who you are and don’t give in to the temptation to conform to something that isn’t right.
A seed doesn’t become a tree overnight. Anything that is worth having takes time to build. Do not force yourself to fit into something out of impatience. Keep working at it until it becomes what you desire. If it doesn’t pan out, release it and move on. You may be disappointed but remember that you did your best. You do not have to fit in into a friendship or a relationship where you don’t feel liberated, comfortable enough, or secure. A deeply meaningful relationship needs chemistry and finding that chemistry takes its own time. Patience is a virtue, which you may not have innately, but must develop if you desire to have big successes.
While growing up we had so much energy and could do multiple things: Studying, playing, learning to read, write, eat, walk, etc. It kept going on. As we grew older, we tried to keep pace with everybody, feeling more exhausted than ever before. You do not have to do what everyone else is doing. It’s completely your personal choice what to add and what to omit from your list of demands!
Many of the things you read online, especially in your social media feeds may appear to be true, but most often it is not. Social media has morphed into public information utilities that now control how most people have their views, helping spread misinformation faster than ever.
Social media can be positive for your mental health. But, the moment you feel left out, and it starts impacting your self-esteem, give yourself a break. So be mindful of how much time you are using scrolling through your social media feed. Spend your time judiciously so that you don’t get engulfed in the fake world that social media offers.
After you have found your life’s calling, you naturally won’t fit into the box people made for you. You have found ‘your people” who lift you higher. Now, you don’t worry too much about others. You’re open to challenges and you speak your mind with confidence. Simply keep working on yourself and build your dreams. It’s the biggest adventure to live the life of your dreams while praising and celebrating every moment.
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